Sunday, April 22, 2007
It was the best of times, it was the not-so best of times.
While I don't have enough "real" material with which to compose a decent, attention holding post, I am hoping to string together elements of the last few weeks into some respectable slathering of words and funnies so that we'll still be friends.
Call it stream of consciousness. Potpourri. Factual events. Lingering impressions. I give you the most recent, haphazard chapter of my life in no particular order.
Call it stream of consciousness. Potpourri. Factual events. Lingering impressions. I give you the most recent, haphazard chapter of my life in no particular order.
- I ran my first half marathon. Well, I ran MOST of my first half marathon. I walked the nasty, nasty hills of Saint Louis mouthing the words to Avril Lavigne's "Girlfriend" while I bopped my head in time. I admittedly did not train as hard in those last few weeks as my running partner did. I was too busy staying up all night with sick people and sleeping like a homeless person during the day. Running partner? She kicked ASS. I kicked some smaller versions of something that sometimes, when you squint, look like an ass. Some people call it an ass, and I kicked it by most standards. I finished in a respectable time, didn't mangle my gimp knee and managed to snag a beer at mile 11, which, let's be honest, was a solid highlight of running for THREE HOURS. Without the promise of beer, however, what do you ladies think of meeting up in 2008 for a group race somewhere? Think about it. Roll it around in your mouths for a while. I hear quite a few of you are starting your own little running regimens. Maybe a nice 10 miler?
- It's less than 30 days until I actually graduate from nursing school. Less than 2 weeks of hospital work left, however. I breathe easier with the thought of both. I look forward to massive amounts of time devoted to sleeping and catching up on all my Tivoed shows.
- I have no desire to harp on the tragedies that happened earlier this week. I think we are all already carrying around some grief about it in our own ways. Strangely, however, the creepy culprit of the whole thing lived not a quarter of a mile from my house. In my development. The myriad of news vans and media machines blocked the street. His poor family isn't there anymore (for what it's worth, they lost a child unexpectedly, too, though arguably, they lost him a long time ago), but the police cones still litter the street and make it hard to forget every time you drive past.
- Vitamin enriched diet coke. "Diet Coke - Plus" for those of you new to the idea. What on earth. Are we at that place in our society when we obtain our vitamins from something on the opposite side of the spectrum from nutritious? What's next? Snickers bars with vitamins?! (I might be down for that, actually.) Incidentally, and not to burst your bubbles, you'd have to drink over 15 of those sodas to get your daily value. Though that isn't a very hard feat for some people. They'd probably have cancer from the artificial sweeteners sooner than they had the vitamins, though.
- I am generally against people who, in the name of making a point, ask a rapid-fire set of rhetorical questions that they immediately answer before pouring into the next unnecessary question. For example: Do I think that Twin Peaks was an awesome show in the 90s? Yes. Do I think that maybe my mom should have been more aware that I was watching one strange, disturbing show in my impressionable youth? Yes. Do I think that my love affair with Kyle MacLaughlin started when he was but a mere black-coffee loving special agent sent to find Laura Palmer's killer? Yes. Do I think it's amazing, in hindsight, that the show was so ridiculous that it managed to stay on the air as long as it did? Yes. Do I worry that sometimes, absentmindedly or when drunk, I might actually have a conversation like this? Yes.
- Last week (and between 2AM and 5AM, just like I told you) a 22 year old patient coded and YOURS TRULY gave him chest compressions. Yes, I performed my very first CPR (sans rescue breaths) on a living human being not named Annie, and no, he wasn't okay. I mention it proudly and without grief for the poor dude that I was wailing on because he lived. I (and probably some of the heart stimulating medications they were pushing into him at the time -- but let's just say ME) pushed a pulse back into this kid after nearly 10 minutes of pulselessness. The best part here (I mean, the best part other than him living, of course) is that I broke two of the dude's ribs with my totally-sweet chest compressions. If had even the slightest idea how to print the image of his chest x-ray with my fracturing handiwork visible so that I could post it here for my own glory, you bet your asbestos I would. I would have it framed and put in my entryway. I save lives and break bones. What an awesome dichotomy. This is the best job ever.
- A salesman came to the door recently while we were eating dinner. It wouldn't have been so terrible except that he rang the bell and then immediately rapped on the screen door -- a concoction of sounds that sent our youngest, and most tough-acting, cat running for her damned life with every piece of fur on her body standing straight up right behind the couch. She stayed lodged back there for so long, trembling in fear that the Betrothed bent himself over the back of the couch to make sure she didn't need a few life-saving rib fractures. There she shuddered and next to her -- two very small, but distinct droplets of cat pee. My cat wet her pants with fear. I nearly wet mine laughing.
- If what Imus (a man I had really never heard of before last week) said was so terrible (and I'm not here to debate that at all), then why do all the news anchors keep repeating it over a week after it was uttered? Isn't it offensive to keep hearing it over and over? Why do such a crude and disrespectful slur justice by continually saying it? Just a thought.
- My last patient was a lady who miraculously survived her OD on God only knows what. I saw her practically lifeless body wheeled up from the ED before my shift ended two days ago, and when I came back the next night she was well into her first day of detoxing. Awesome. Apparently part of detoxing that they don't write about in textbooks is the strange aversion to one's clothing and the need to be constantly naked and showy. In my attempts to redress her and make her comfortable (a feat desperately impossible, sadly, given the nature of her stay with us) she called me a bitch and threatened to pee on me. Which, really, after hours of a night shift fighting with her to remain clothed and sedated, I would have LOVED to have seen -- at least seen her attempt.
- This morning I tried on MY-my wedding dress in the shop for the first time. It arrived and more importantly, it zipped perfectly. (The BFF and I did have an amusing round of singing "Jesus, let it zip" a la Carrie Underwood. Not only did it zip, it was a little big. I was literally scolded by my bridal consultant of undetermined national origin for loosing weight. I swear I didn't do it intentionally. In that case, though, Doritos here I come.) I started to get the excited chills and bubbles in my stomach of anticipation of being a bride and most of all, marrying a one of a kind man who makes me happy in ways no one else has. (And no, that wasn't a veiled reference to sexin'.)
- I hear that my beloved Catholic Church has recently rescinded their whole stance on "limbo for unbaptized babies". Which is good news for unbaptized babies. Apparently it wasn't a true tenant of Catholic faith, it was just some little tidbit that managed to squeak its way into every Catholic education class ever since the dawn of time. Or the dawn of Catholicism. Whichever came first. Could be either, really. So, then, might it be safe to assume if there is no limbo that every time a bell rings an unbaptized baby gets, what, jeered at by baptized babies? That's rough. But that's just how Catholics roll. We're a tough crowd.
# posted by Cathy @ 1:28:00 AM 
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CONGRATS on your big save! Man, all I do at work is file :) I think a 2008 group run would be awesome... I bet I could rope in Allison W, the happy marathoner. Maybe a 10M or half marathon someplace interesting?
# posted by 
: 1:40 PM
: 1:40 PM
You kicked ass. And you kick ass on a regular basis - you are going into a field that involves saving people's lives, not just saving people money...
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