Wednesday, October 18, 2006
I went to nursing school and all you get are these useless facts...
I don't care much for Wednesdays this semester as it means that I'll be spending 6 solid hours (save the 10 minutes to run from the first 3 hour class to the second 3 hour class) on my ass in lecture. No needles, no catheters, no gore and no opportunity for me to lace clever sarcasm into some strange healthcare situation. To give them credit, these professors do their best to keep the lecture moving, but let's be honest. After 3 hours of powerpoint(my own personal hell)/overhead projectors and the constant chatter of inane undergraduates, it is, in a word: painful.
Except today, really. I seemed to be learning things left and right -- and strangely, not a tidbit of it relevant to either of my classes or my general career choice.
I give you -- What I Learned Today:
1. The word "nylon" actually refers to the two locations that simultaneously created the fiber -- New York and London. Much like the word "denim" indicates where it was created -- Nimes, France. Hence, de Nimes (of or from Nimes).
2. The creature with the largest brain-to-body-size ratio is the ant.
3. "Meth" and "Crystal Meth" are two different things. Similar, but different. Additionally, apparently the red-blooded midwesterners who hold down the center-part of our great nation were not the first group to get it on with (Crystal)Meth. According to Lisa Ling (and she knows her shit), the Japanese kamikaze pilots used it during WWII to A) keep them awake and B) get and keep them super stoked about their inevitable crash and burn later. Awesome!
4. The insect known as the "earwig" actually has two penises (peni?) that point in different directions. A single penis of theirs is actually longer than the earwig itself, but is incredibly fragile -- perhaps the reasoning behind having two.... just in case.
5. Elephants can't jump. An affliction I hear also affects white men.
6. Massachusetts elementary schools are banning tag, flag football and "other chase games" in the fear that someone may get hurt and the school be held liable. It is a serious problem that we're bringing up the next generation as a bunch of sissies. Seriously. Very seriously.
Who knows what trivia game you'll totally kick ass and take names with now!
Except today, really. I seemed to be learning things left and right -- and strangely, not a tidbit of it relevant to either of my classes or my general career choice.
I give you -- What I Learned Today:
1. The word "nylon" actually refers to the two locations that simultaneously created the fiber -- New York and London. Much like the word "denim" indicates where it was created -- Nimes, France. Hence, de Nimes (of or from Nimes).
2. The creature with the largest brain-to-body-size ratio is the ant.
3. "Meth" and "Crystal Meth" are two different things. Similar, but different. Additionally, apparently the red-blooded midwesterners who hold down the center-part of our great nation were not the first group to get it on with (Crystal)Meth. According to Lisa Ling (and she knows her shit), the Japanese kamikaze pilots used it during WWII to A) keep them awake and B) get and keep them super stoked about their inevitable crash and burn later. Awesome!
4. The insect known as the "earwig" actually has two penises (peni?) that point in different directions. A single penis of theirs is actually longer than the earwig itself, but is incredibly fragile -- perhaps the reasoning behind having two.... just in case.
5. Elephants can't jump. An affliction I hear also affects white men.
6. Massachusetts elementary schools are banning tag, flag football and "other chase games" in the fear that someone may get hurt and the school be held liable. It is a serious problem that we're bringing up the next generation as a bunch of sissies. Seriously. Very seriously.
Who knows what trivia game you'll totally kick ass and take names with now!
# posted by Cathy @ 9:46:00 PM 
